warning: system overload...

its insane how far you can push yourself before losing it.

the past couple of months have been flat out and it has only escalated over the past couple of weeks to the point that today i feel like i'm about to collapse.

would somebunny please just wrap me up in a straitjacket, wheel me into a mental asylum of some sort and just leave me there - preferably heavily medicated - to sleep for a year or two. pretty please with sugar on top?

in a nutshell? well had my final assessment on last wed (so spent the previous week setting everything up pretty much from 5:30am to 11pm every day). a job application with work examples to type up on thu. pack up for move fri-sat. come up with a concept for a scholarship interview before monday. make a scholarship interview presentation on sun. train all the way fucken west to attend the interview on mon morning. get back to city to arrange everything for the move as soon as the interview was done. EMPTY AND CLEAN MY ENTIRE APARTMENT IN FORTY-FUCKEN-MINS!!! and spend the rest of the night moving all my shit to the new place.

i wish i will never have to live through a period as hectic as the last couple of weeks. seriously, fucken never EVER again.

i honestly wouldn't have survived this all without deviant and its no exaggeration. last night as i collapsed on his bed ready to sleep for a week (or the few hrs i actually could before getting up at 5:30am again) i realised just how much he has done for me lately.

seriously, if from today onwards i'd spent all my waking hours serving him non-stop bjs while pouring beer down his throat and massaging his feet (all simultaneously of course) i could not even dream of settling my debt before xmas.

i think i'll start by cooking him dinner. mebbe as soon as tomorrow if i get all my shit organised tonight.

shit. that reminds me: today is the sca grad show and i don't think i can make it. i really really REALLY want to. but i just got another call from my new real estate agent saying that i need to go and sign yet another form right after work. and i am struggling even getting through the day at the office. and i need to get my apartment sorted out. i haven't even opened the first box yet.

mebbe i should switch from caffeine to speed?