Monday, September 25, 2006

south coast rok big time

as much as i love sydney, fuck its good to get away every now and then. especially when - like this time - you happen to score the perfect weather for a weekend by the beach.

deviant took me four hours down the coast for a late bday celebration with his family. which naturally meant fishing, piss-up and most of all the beach.

the weather was seriously spoiling us and i just pranced around in my luvly new bikinis pretty much the entire time... also, managed to provide the ladies with a lil bit too much sun and now my poor titties are lobster red and sore as all hell. not good.

on the first night there we were visited by a few very hungry and equally adorable possums. apart from them being cute as all hell, i am still enough of a tourist to get excited abt the hairy lil oz natives.

what made it especially cool was that the mummy on the rail here had a lil baby in it's pouch. now i have to admit that i don't know what to call the lil one... a baby roo is called a 'joey' but i'm not sure if a possum baby has such a default name?


you know the way every tv-show always has the comic sidekick? well, as far as our trips and piss-ups go, that's citronella. and fuck he does it well.

on saturday we went for a long walk along the beach to get to this specific fishing spot. the walk takes about an hour but the scenery was stunning and the spot was good so it was worth it.

we got to the spot and the men fished until sunset. when it started to get darker, we packed up and headed back towards the car hoping to make the whole one hour walk back before it gets too dark.

we were all pretty much buggered from the long walk in as well as spending the entire day in the sun fishing (or in my case going seriously snap happy). after walking for 10 minutes or so citronella started having some serious drama with the long walk ahead of us and suddenly decides to take a shortcut heading straight into the bush. yeh, not good.

abt 10 mins later the rest of us come to a clearing and he's nowhere to be seen. we sit and wait for him and start to get a lil bit worried since we can't see him and he's not answering our calls.

after waiting for a good 15-20 minutes we really start to get worried and plan what to do in case he's tripped on something and knocked himself unconscious somewhere in the thick bush around us.

just when we are getting both really pissed off and worried, he suddenly emerges all scratched and fucked up from the middle of the thickest part of the bush. before we had a chance to tell him off - and keep in mind that we were worried sick and seeing him still alive and relatively well turned all the worried energy into homicidal rage - he just goes "well, that sure wasn't the fastest way!" and nonchalantly marches past us to continue along the beach.

fuck i cracked up. i mean, you can't even be angry with this fuckwit. he's just too fucken funny.

we were keen on getting back as soon as possible and admittedly were walking pretty fast. poor citronella didn't agree with the fast pace at all and for the rest of the walk he was just ranting, raving and whinging on non-stop about - and i quote - "what a drama i'm having!" poor bugger.

later on we were sitting indoors enjoying a glass of laphroaig being all civilised and shit when citronella storms into the cabin. "well, i just did something i have never done before... i pissed on a kangaroo!" and after a lil think he continues "that was cool. i'm gonna go and do it again!"

bunnies, this man is truly an asset.

i have to tell you: there is nothing quite like seeing a six-foot-five giggling drunken bastard running around the camping ground with a beer in one hand and his cock in the other, chasing roos trying to piss on them.

absolutely priceless.

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