“I have this mate of mine that you’d really like!” she suddenly shoots over a piña colada big enough to make any drag queen’s hands seem tiny. As I respond by giggling obviously drunk enough to be entertained by any bad idea available, she continues: ”You know, a real man: tall, dark and handsome. Hung like a donkey and goes on for hours!” And without waiting for my approval, she starts typing away the text message.

Stumbling into a yet another bar along our path, we dash straight into the ladies room. As soon as we slam the door open, we face a young woman with her top hoisted all the way up to her armpits. “They’re fake.” She states as soon as she sees us. Naturally we engage ourselves into a long conversation about the perky little B-cups, squeezing and poking as we go. We exit the bathroom laughing at the idea that maybe the male stereotypical fantasies about ladies rooms and girls’ locker rooms aren’t that far fetched after all.

The text message confirming the boy’s arrival beeps on my friend’s mobile. Hugging my glass of white wine I prepare myself for a major disappointment as we make it back to our table. Squinting my eyes to clear the drunken blurry vision I try to catch my let down of the night arriving. Instead, I see this mind-bogglingly gorgeous six-foot-five hunk walk up and greet us in a beautiful deep voice filtered through his borderline shy boy-next-door grin. Nearly choking on my wine I try to hide the pleasant surprise as well as the degree to which I was marinated in cheap white wine.

”You said you had a roof-top pool?” he suggests with a devious wink and I swallow the lure gleefully. Surely it was a short enough trip for an after party at my place, to make it with the three of us in a two seater ute? Fetching yet another bottle of white along with a six pack of Becks from the nearby bottle-o, I giggle my way into the front seat of his car and pull my friend on my lap.

I regain my consciousness slowly and recognise the disturbance to my sleep as an unfamiliar ringing tone. Before I open my eyes I feel an arm reaching over me for the ringing phone on the floor next to my bed. As I squint for a sneak peak through half closed eyelids I see my friend still asleep on the other side of the gorgeous hunk. She is as beautiful as he is handsome.

He answers the phone and after glancing around him with a wide grin he replies to the voice on the other end: “Mate, I am SO comfortable in this bed right now that there is nothing in the world that could make me get up…” The sound of the phone falling on the floor followed by a soft pleased growl transfers the grin on my face as he wraps his arms around me and pulls me closer. I drift back to sleep thinking: "A real man alright..."