And there was shoes...

Bring on tomorrow night's opening!

Finally finished my video AND was able to export it in a format that didn't screw with the frame rate once burned onto a DVD. Judging by the pile of fucked up DVDs on my desk it took just as many goes as it felt like.

Just got back from the gallery and was lucky enough to pick a choice monitor for myself too. Can't wait to see my latest baby up and running.

Its been ages since any of my videos have been exhibited (yes, I'm well aware what a lazy old cunt I am) and now I'm quite excited to see people reacting to my work after such a long break.

Especially since this new work is quite different to my old pieces in the sense that it contains no sexual references or pornographic material what so ever...

New office heels

Aren't they gorgeous?

A workmate of mine tipped me off to a good pair of black office heels by Nine West, but I never made it that far. See, there's a Mollini store on the way...

This cute and playfully feminine pair of chunky heels was whispering my name all the way from the door, and they were so incredibly comfy that I couldn't leave them there.

...can't you just hear them screaming out for a pair of white knee high socks and a school girl skirt?

The Ultimate Come-Fuck-Me Boots[tm]

It was meant to be bunnies!

I saw the PERFECT pair of boots last year, but they didn't have my size left... in any of the stores country wide! I cried over them for two months. And I cried blood. For I have tried to find The Ultimate Come-Fuck-Me Boots[tm] for years.

Today, we were doing our weekly shopping with Deviant when I accidentally strayed into a Wittner store. And there they were! The same wonder boots that had been out of my reach a year ago were now screaming for me to own them!

They had only one pair in my size left, and that pair now securely rests in a beautiful shoebox in my collections.

Bunnies, these boots are PERFECT. Black leather, totally seamless apart from the sexy zipper running up the back of the calf. The sexiest sky high thin stiletto heel and the perfect rounded toe. Flawless!

I was just going to get them on lay by and fetch them next month, but Deviant wouldn't let me walk out of the store without them.

So very hot. So very perfect. So very mine-mine-MINE! Muahahahahahaha!

Shoes

The difference between men and women

An anonymous comment made me think about the difference between men and women when it comes to shoes. While I'm a total shoe fanatic, I don't think I'd feel comfortable with a man who had a collection to match mine.

In my little world men are only allowed the luxury of shoe fetishism one way: drooling at high heels on female feet. You Tarzan - me Jane. Full fucken stop*.

None of this metro shit for me, thank you very much.

I reckon men need healthy blokey addictions like fishing gear, beer or porn... and of course shit hot sky high stilettos on female feet. Especially now that its been proven beneficial.

(* Of course, gay men are a delightful exception to the rule and make the best shopping company.)

Shopping list

You know what bunnies? I'm starting to think that when ever I buy shoes, I should buy at least two pairs of the same!

Every time I find a pair I *really* like - you know those shit hot every day shoes you find every now and then - I wear them out in less than a year and never find a replacement pair.

My gorgeous black rmk stiletto pumps are a perfect example. They go with everything, look shit hot and are even remotely comfortable to wear. I've been fearing that the left heel is about to give in and today I felt it start wobbling while walking. My favourite pair is on its way out the door.

[Insert here immense sorrow and sobbing]

To my surprise and joy, I found rmk still advertised the shoes on their website, so I might have a slight chance of getting a replacement pair after all.

If I'm able to find a store that still stocks these beauties, I'm ordering a pair in each colour and the black ones in double!


I also really liked the look of these shoes and think I'll have to add a pair (or two?) of them on the shopping list too...

I just KNEW there was a justification for all the pain!

Great news bunnies! Look what I just stumbled into during my morning blog roll:

HEELS BOOST SEX LIFE

STILETTOS can be good for a woman's sex life, says a study which claims wearing them ``directly works the pleasure muscles linked to orgasm''.

Experts found the high heels toned women’s legs and strengthened pelvic muscles.

In tests, Dr Maria Cerruto, of the University of Verona, Italy, discovered that wearing a pair of ‘‘moderately high heeled shoes’’ had beneficial effects for a woman’s sex life.

‘‘Heels work the pelvic muscles and reduce the need to exercise them.

‘‘Wearing heels during daily activity may reduce the need for the pelvic floor exercises necessary to keep that part of a woman’s anatomy toned and elastic,’’ Cerruto said.

She asked 66 women under 50 about their sex lives, exercise regime and shoes.

In tests, their pelvic muscles were more relaxed in higher heels, increasing their strength and ability to contract.

‘‘Women often have difficulty in carrying out the right exercises for the pelvic zone and wearing heels could prove to be the solution,’’ Cerruto said.

Manolo Blahnik, whose shoes are worn by Sex and the City’s Carrie Bradshaw, said: ‘‘This is wonderful news. I’ve been hounded for years about how bad it is for posture, but . . . when you put on a high heel it makes life more exciting. For women, it’s a way to appeal to the male species.

‘‘There’s a limit. Anything over 11.5cm, you can’t walk properly; it’s no longer elegant.’

[via]

I see bubbly coctails and giggly chicks

Tonight is Miss Pearl's hens night. The invitation mentions cheese and bickies on her balcony, followed by dinner, cocktails and dancing.

Cheese and bickies? Excuse me?

I mean, this is Miss Pearl we're talking about. What the fuck happened to donkey shows? Or at least pointing and laughing at cheap and dodgy strippers?

Bunnies, if my sanity ever fails me for long enough to end up in a situation where I'd be planning to tie the knot with some poor bastard, I'd be fucken expecting at least a hobo death match, doing lines off a donkey's stomach (strippers are so last year), a threesome with Diggnation and waking up on another continent with no recollection of leaving the country in the first place.

Fuck cheese and bickies.

Well, at least the dress code is 'frock, high heels and big hair' which provides me with the perfect opportunity to take my new heels out for the first time...

Luscious new Zoe Wittner heels

Well, we left the house to do grocery shopping. Three hours later I get home with these:

These Zoe Wittner heels define hot black stiletto heels. The shape is nothing short of perfect and somehow they make legs looks super long even beyond the aid of the sky high heels.

It was love at first sight. Thank gawd Deviant agreed and later on confessed that if I had tried to walk out of the store without the shoes, he would have bought them for me.

Damn it. Next time I have to test walking out first and then if nothing happens go back to buy the heels...

Its good to be back

Not only did I suddenly gain back my gorgeous hunk of man meat, the super delicious dinners he cooks for me, the mind-bogglingly yummy sex life and the beautiful Sydney summer - I also got back just in time for the sales on Oxford Street! Bliss.

Oh my beloved shoe stores, how I have missed thee! Now just look at these gorgeous slinky forest green Mollini numbers I scored today:

Aren't they just delicious?

Mind you, they do pose a problem: now I need to find shit to wear them with as I don't have anything green at the moment. Yes, I can see a new excursion to Oxford St happening on Saturday...

Which brings me to my next subject. Now don't get me wrong bunnies, I love going back to Finland... but how fucken bad does the shoe shopping in Tampere stink?!? Hideous shoes at horrendous prices! Unbearable I tell you!

If you know Tampere shoe store stockists, please let them know that I personally think they should be dragged behind the barn and executed for crimes against humanity.

Shoe spotting

[via]

Spotted these babies worn by Angelina during my morning blog roll. I NEED THOSE HEELS.

More delicious heels

The only thing sexier than this pair of heels is the gorgeous hunk who bought them for me...

I was having a bit of a bad day and Deviant decided to cheer me up with these delicious stiletto pumps. What a perfect man!

2008

Bunnies, it's been a while. Starting a brand new year seems like the perfect excuse to get back on the horse, don't you think?

Despite turning into a sickeningly happy coupled up old cunt, I still seem to have the ability to end up in situations not recommended for healthy human beings. Piss-ups, bad ideas and unhealthy mates still make up a major portion of my life, even if most of my time is spent in the office as a corporate whore or playing the perfect little Stepford wife at home.

Cooking in stockings and stilettos seems to work surprisingly well just as designing drunk, so all is well in the world of shoeboxes.

Right now, 2008 looks every bit as delicious as this pair of heels my gorgeous hunk of man meat gave me for my 30th:

shoes, oh, glorious shoes!

i got my first paycheck from my new job yesterday. oh the glorious day!

the office is right next to oxford st. now i have a feeling that this tiny detail concerning the location will have a drastic effect on my budget. so many pretty things!

i went to get some lunch with this feisty petite lil producer chicky and of course we fucken ended up shopping for shoes!

mind you i did score a drop dead gorgeous italian $400 pair of heels for a very good price. gorgeous classy cream coloured leather shoes with a very feminine vintage feel to them. it was love at first sight.

speaking of shoes, please ignore the fact that i just posted a pic of lindsay bloody lohan.

focus on the shoes bunnies

I - NEED - THOSE - SHOES ! if any of you bunnies see heels like that somewhere around syd pls let me know! they are absolutely gorgeous!

i <3 tony bianco - part 3

bunnies, aren't they gorgeous?

i had drooled after this particular pair for months and only mentioned 'a gorgeous blue pair of biancos' to deviant in passing.

when the poor thing was stressing over my present, he remembers me mentioning the shoes and goes researching tony bianco shoes online and then calling up the stores one by one. in the end he found a store near my work that he figured i had seen the shoes in and rocks up going 'blue suede pair of tony biancos in size 7. help me!'

isn't that adorable? i mean, do things get any sexier than a man who goes buying shoes for you?

red hot summer heels

tp: 'oh... i think i was a bad girl again today'
deviant: *sigh* 'what kinda shoes?'
tp: 'red, shiny and very, very high...?'
deviant: 'mmm... sounds like they've got all the makings for a hot pair of heels alright...'

yes, i was bad. and yes, they're very, very hot. don't you think?

i've created a monster

i had this incredibly beautiful little red pair of gabor heels that were too small for me. i had been carrying them with me for 5 yrs.

see, when i bought them, i thought i could squeeze my feet into them - which i actually could - but fuck it hurt. they were too beautiful to let go of, so they just sat in my collection of shoeboxes waiting for the purpose of their existance to rise up.

deviant's lil sisters came over to stay with him for the weekend. aged 10 and 13 they're every bit as beautiful as their two older brothers are handsome. the older is already 15cm taller than i am and could no doubt walk into any bar without being carded, but the smaller one still looks like the adorable lil kid she is. i could honestly adopt the lil one. both of the girls rok, but the lil one is just like my own lil sister back home in finland.

about half way through the first day we came to the conclusion that we should have served the lil one with valium for brekky while the rest of us would have needed speed to keep up. where the fuck do they get their energy from?

oh right, back to the shoes.

see, i realised that the lively lil 10 year old is in fact a size 6 just like my beautiful lil pair of red gabor heels. and the heels are just right for her too as they are only about 4cm high. so after asking for deviant's approval, i gave the lil sister her first pair of heels and she luveded them.

i don't think she took them off the whole w/e.

UPDATE: challenged

maurelita challenged me to reveal my shoeboxes.

50 pairs of shoes*:

• 40 pairs of high heels
• 33 pairs of stiletto heels
• 17 pairs that i wear almost weekly
  
• 15 pairs of black shoes
  
• 7 pairs of red shoes
  
• 6 pairs of classic pumps
• 6 pairs of wedges
• 5 pairs of sneakers
• 5 pairs of thongs
• 5 pairs of 40's style classic lady pumps
• 1 pair of cfm** boots
• 1 pair that is not uncomfortable/painful to wear (=my dear runners)

r.i.p. 7 pairs that i have trashed beyond repair.

(* this is only the shoes that i have with me here in sydney.

when i arrived here 3 yrs ago i had 3 pairs of shoes with me. the rest have accumulated since. there is also a secondary collection in finland, but that is hardly up to date and most likely assimilated into my mum's shoe collection by now...)

(** cfm boots = come fuck me boots)